Beware Whining to follow

I am a horrible sick person. I whine and whimper and make anybody who walks past feel my head to see if I am as warm as I was 2 minutes ago. Kaity will feel my head as she passes and say sweet placating things in an attempt to either make me feel better or make me stop whining. I would be happy if either would occur. Joshua spends his time bringing me every pillow he can find because somehow in his little self pillows make you feel better. I flail and whine and annoy myself with both. I know that I feel like trash and yet still the ghosts of childhood past creep into my head and challenge me. I spend my time willing myself to feel better and denying that I don't. All the while hearing "you're such a hypochondriac" looping in a familiar voice in my head. I thought last night that I felt better. I went to bed feeling pretty good and woke up feeling a little rough. As the day goes on so does the decline in how I feel, ugh. Right now I'm trying to muzzle my inner whiner and arrange all these pillows. I think noodle soup is on the menu tonight with a nice gorilla cheese sammich.

My boy

Joshypot is a few weeks shy of being officially 5 1/2 years old. He was born second, the little brother from the moment he came into the world. He seemed to enjoy this spot, it was his spot after all. Kaity introduced herself to him in the hospital with a formal "Hello, My name is Kaity and I am going to be your big sister." having a big meant that he was the little. Sometimes he basks in the little. The little gets served first, the little gets a longer turn, the little fits more easily in the momma lap. Sometimes he bucks against it. The little NEVER gets to go around the block alone, the little has to go to bed earlier, the little never gets to pour drinks. He's also learning how to be gallant and gracious which sometimes collides with the will and want of the little within him. Kaity has this new gig being a mommy helper and I love that she has started to cultivate this business out of desire to save money and help others, but it leaves Joshypot stuck in the depths of the yucky little. He is too little to watch children, he's too little mow yards. He is currently waiting til we visit Gramma O'Day because she's asked if he thinks he could help her pick up sticks, since he's closer to the ground and can see them better. Gotta love a Gramma who can spin little into such a positive. However, this post was not meant to be about the little, it was meant to be about the transformation that happens when Kaity goes to work. She leaves and as the door closes Joshy becomes the big, not like he's wearing a sloppy shirt that doesnt fit but more like he completely fills up the room that was left by the big going elsewhere. He even sees it. Today we came home from dropping Kaity off and he went and retrieved the garbage can that is taller than he is from the curb, he wrestled it all the way to the fence and put it away. He then played in the garage but left the door open into the house incase I needed something. He came in and got my drink, just in case I was thirsty. He got himself an apple and brought me one too...and even let me pick mine first. He ate his apple with gusto then decided he might need to switch to a banana because they are soft and apples make his teeth feel funny. *Let me interject here that when Kaity first had a loose tooth Joshua actually cried because he's the little and nothing good ever happens to him like getting new teeth. THEN he hit his mouth on the bathroom cabinet while breakdancing *and* brushing his teeth (a combo not to be repeated in this house) and his tooth was loose and he cried because he was scared of being the big too soon.* I asked him if his tooth was loose and he put down the apple and wiggled it. It moved, slightly at first and then a little more. His eyes grew wide with excitement and he was so thrilled that his tooth was loose! I smiled at him and said "wow buddy you're getting big!" to which he replied "nah, I think I'm just getting medium"
Medium is bittersweet to this momma.

The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them."

That is a quote I heard from Maya Angelou last night. It made me stop and say it a few times. I needed to hold the words in my own mouth to somehow process their depth of meaning. I am an eternal optimist. I see my glass as perpetually half full and am always looking for the silver lining in a bad situation. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt and am always looking through the 'bad' to find their redeeming quality that is a positive. This quote made me realize that believing who people are isn't about being negative but about being sure that THEY know who they are more than I do. Some people are Eeyores, the situation of their lives may change but the constant is the way they perceive it. I am more of a T-I double guh-ER, a little klutzy but pretty upbeat. It is what it is. So I guess I'm on to figure out what believing them looks like to me. How do you eliminate the Eeyores from your life? or do you?

I am so excited.....

for so many reasons! I shall list them!
1. I am going to a sleep over tonight with some of the coolest teenage girls I know! We are going to rockband, karaoke, nail paint, and goofball all night!

2. The Schilldren and I went to an event this week where they colored blanket squares for an organization called "Project Linus". I was excited that it was something we could do and while there ran into another homeschooling mom who told me about a program that looks to be a perfect fit for our family! The kids would be able to participate in 3 classes every Monday w/other homeschooled children. The classes range from Science, History, and Art to Theater, PE, and Math!

3. I love my husband, truly, completely, deeply. He is thoughtful and kind and even when nobody is watching thinks of me in ways that touch my spirit. He didnt know of my plans for today but I guess he always checks to be sure my keys are not locked in the van (i'm bad about leaving them all over the place). This morning he didnt know where they were so he left his van key on the table just in case. I love that he does things like that all the time. Kaity announces often that when she grows up she wants to marry a man just like her Daddy and I adore the fact that I can encourage that without any hesitation. We are approaching our 15th wedding anniversary and I am so thankful that we are still best friends!

4. I am having a Miche Purse Party and I have invitations to pass out, but the consultant filled them out for me! Seems like a small thing but I always worry about my handwriting not being clear enough and now I dont have to worry with it just pass them out! woohoo!

5. Our Anniversary is coming soon, we call it our "Family Birthday" because it was the day our Schill family was born. We always do something special w/the kids so they can celebrate our family birthday and then Jeremy and I do something alone. We have decided that this year we are going to take the metra into the city and go to the Museum of Scienec and Industry as our family date. We are going to use public transportation and have a full out adventure. Since we homeschool we are able to get into the museum for *free* which is amazing! Not sure exactly what Jeremy and I are going to do but it truly doesnt matter, just being with the man is enough.

6. We are not enjoying the new curriculum we are using this year, it's not a 'bad' one it's simply not a good fit for us. I was laying in bed talking to Jeremy about it a few nights ago and how I felt like it was such a blessing to have the cost of schooling covered that I didnt want to NOT do it because I was being picky. The VERY next day I got an email saying the program that paid for it this year will not be available to us next year. Then I found out about the Home Run Kids program. Then I heard so many stories concerning schools in the area that made our choice to homeschool reverberate within me. I am so thankful that the path was paved for me to arrive at a decision that we were on the right track.

So as you can see life is good in my neighborhood. So. Very. Good.

Warm & Fuzzies

Today is one of those days when the stars align and the skies parted and things just flowed. I had a great day schooling Kaity and Joshua. Kaity is starting to multiply triple digits and money with ease and understanding. Joshua is breezing through the latter half of his Kindergarten books but is starting to read his instructions at the top of the page w/little to no help! Joshua has speech on Wednesday afternoons and we've typically made it a date at the commissary afterward. He is rarely pleased until we get there and he realizes that HE is the big kid while it's just the 2 of us. He is my getting of items and leader of conversation. I hear all sorts of things about how he thinks. He tells me calvin and hobbes stories that Daddy has read to him with so much detail it makes me fall in love with Jeremy ever so much more. He has no idea how much his boychild hangs on his every word, or maybe he does. I dont know but it's a beautiful thing to behold. We were looking at canned tomatoes and Joshua then announced loudly that they looked like guts. When I told him that was gross he said "I can't help it Mom, I've got a disgusting sense of humor" Seriously cracked me up, and the lady next to me just looked at us like we were warped. I love days like this

Kaity's Kid Care

Kaity has been saving for a car since she was 4 and asked how much they cost. She wondered if she could get a discount if she wanted one without a top (convertible) since they were less car. No such luck kiddo! As time has gone one she's steadily tucked away her money and looked at ways to get a job. Her latest (and greatest imo) venture is Kaity's Kid Care. She has been told over and over by various friends and family that she has a way with kids. She is gentle and silly and babies/kids flock to her. Today she came to me and said she was thinking about starting her business soon to be a mothers helper. She would watch the children while moms did work around the house since she's too little to out and out babysit. Her dilemma? Pricing. Really?! at 8 1/2 you think about pricing?! She said she wanted her prices to be enough that she could get a good jump on her savings (really i don't know who she belongs too lol) but still inexpensive enough that people could use her over and over. SERIOUSLY!? She is thinking about $5 a day but is afraid that might be too expensive for families with more than 1 kid so she might only charge $3. She noodled it around some more and said "i need a phrase like geico...15 minutes can save you 15 or more on car insurance. that's catchy huh mom?" and she started tossing around ideas for her own phrase to catch peoples attention. She decided on "When you think there is no time at all, Kaity's Kid Care is the one you should call!" and she came up with it entirely on her own. I love that she has mastered the concept of delayed gratification and saving up for something she wants. I don't know that it will make it all the way to her first car but I am enjoying watching this all unfold!

What a difference a few words can make...

Today I read this on a friends facebook page " the blessing of the Lord makes a person rich"

It took my breath away with it's simplistic beauty. I am often amazed at the blessings that abound in my life. Sometimes clutter and chaos creep into my field of vision and I lose sight of how awesome my life is indeed. I am thankful that I am thankful, so many times I think that we forget what we have because we are always longing for the things that we do not. I am rich.