Tuesday, June 22, 2010

These are the days....

that really blur together. The days when waking up and the daily hustle and bustle fuse into the next day and the day after. My mantra when my babies were little was (albeit probably not a GOOD mantra) "they will never remember this", as I awkwardly figured out the motherhood gig. They will never remember the diaper being put on backwards, the shower I received while learning the differences between changing a daughter and a son. Never will they recount the times I forgot naps, or socks, or toys to distract them in the car. All the things that I fumbled will stay tucked safely in my memory not theirs. My mantra has changed over the past year my 'never' has become 'may' and it's truly impacted the way I do things. Rushing through the routine takes roughly only 3 minutes less time than enjoying it. Singing all the verses to a bedtime song adds less than 90 seconds. Letting them help me stir the sauce or chop the veggies will only delay dinner by 5 minutes. I figure even in the hustle and bustle of it all I can spare 10 minutes.

This could be the moment they remember. The first deposit they contribute into the memory bank that is their childhood. Not the retelling of a story they've heard so many times that it feels like they remember. I want that when they will recall these moments later they will feel delighted in not endured. I am the first to admit I over think and am probably pouring more into the concept of this than it is worthy of holding. Or maybe not.
I don't delude myself into thinking they will not remember the crazy mommy moments I have. The instantly infuriating quest for a shoe when we are running late. The sighs that escape my lips while explaining for the 100th time why we must wear a seat belt. The short tempered moments are going to be there but I hopefully I can temper them with the patient ones as well.

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